Now, while I may not be a man, I happen to have grown up with more than a few (So. Many. Brothers.) so I consider myself somewhat well-informed on what guys – bros in particular – enjoy. While all men are undeniably entertaining, my favorite guys happen to be festival bros.  What exactly is a festival bro, you ask? Well, you might be one if you have ever gone to a concert and said/yelled one or more of the following:

• You know what this festival needs? BEER PONG.
• Sun’s out, guns out!
• Yo dude, put on “Levels” again!
• Watch it! You almost spilled beer on my “Party With Sluts” tank!
• Oh my GOD man, did you see the slam-pieces at the port-a-potties? That brunette in the fringe could GET IT.
• I’m not settling for any girl less than a solid 7.5 today. Last week was an exception.
• LET’S F*CKIN’ RAAAAGGGGEEEEEE!!!!!!

Yeah, you know who you are.

Lucky for you, I happen to have compiled a list of absolute bro-sentials for your rage-cation, so you can focus on having the most bitchin’ time possible rather than worrying about what to pack.  So, without further ado…

1) SOLO CUPS – Always a staple of any party, pre-game, post-game, or Tuesday morning, Solo Cups have been scientifically proven (not really) to serve approximately a million different purposes.  I mean, come on, they can hold beer, liquor, OR soda (only if you’re lame though, go home.) So make sure to grab at least one pack for any festival outing and get your drink on!
BRO TIP: Don’t bring too many.  If you “happen” to run out, or your drunkard friends wander off with them, you can always strike up a convo with the hottie the next car over to borrow some. SHWING!

2) SH*T BOX – Yo man, don’t look at me like that. You know as well as I do that there’s literally NOTHING worse than being so close to sealing the deal with that 9.5 you were talking to (you know, the one that lent you the solo cups? Yeah, that one) and having the beer sh*ts. Even worse? All her friends are over at the port-a-potties still, and will totally judge you if you’re in there for more than five minutes.  So excuse yourself to “get more beer,” grab this happy little doody box, find a quiet corner (good luck with that,) and pop a squat. You’ll be glad you did.
BRO TIP: Bring extra sh*t bags. While lightening may never strike twice, poop very well might.

3) NEON CLOTHING – Whether it be the above-mentioned “Party With Sluts” tank or a simple trucker hat that says “Rage,” you NEED neon. This way, what you’re there for is clear, and the bids can see you from a mile away. Doesn’t get better than that.
BRO TIP: The more neon, the better.  You know what they say, YORO, “You Only Rage Once”…that weekend, that is.

4) BEER KOOZIE – Every good bro should be like a boy scout when it comes to getting hammered: always prepared.  Beer koozies are probably the most basic thing you can have, but are also the most useful.  There are few things worse than a warm Natty Light, hamiright?
BRO TIP: if at all possible, your koozie should say something. Great conversation starter, and everyone knows that only GDI’s have plain ones. Don’t be a GDI.

5) SUNGLASSES – The last thing you want to do is have everyone think you’re a creeper because it looks like you’re glaring at them all day.  Avoid that problem altogether and match your hat and tank with some neon wayfarers.  The best part? They’re so cheap that they’ll barely cut into your beer fund!
BRO TIP: Avoid anything with a tinted lens.  No one wants to look at you and see there drunken selves in your eyes.

6) DISPOSABLE CAMERA – While many say that “memories may last forever” let’s face it: if you don’t remember anything in the first place, they really don’t.  Make sure that those memories really do stay with you by bringing a camera to the festival, and hey, also make sure to snap a pic with all of the 9’s you were talking to so you can make all your bros back home jealous.
BRO TIP: No selfies.

7) LIGHTERS – For regular cigarettes, funny cigarettes, or even if you just like to burn sh*t, you never want to be the guy without a lighter. If a slampiece comes up to you and asks for a light, what are you gonna do? Nothing, you’re going to watch her go to the Sigma Delta Boner a couple people down and lose a bangin’ opportunity. Don’t be that guy.
BRO TIP: Try not to use said lighter to set that pledge that tagged along on fire.

8) SPEAKERS – What’s a pre-game without some bitchin’ tunes? LAME, that’s what.  Bring some portable speakers along to make sure you don’t overheat and/or kill the battery of your mom’s minivan, we all know how she is when she’s mad. (She’s HOT, that’s what.)
BRO TIP: When I say portable speakers, I mean just that: SPEAKERS. Don’t be the guy with the boombox, (too big and 90’s,) and even worse, don’t skimp on the speakers altogether and be the guy with the guitar (no one wants to hear you play “Wonderwall” AGAIN.)

9) UMBRELLA – Now, many would not think of this, but an umbrella is really a sure-fire way to pick up chicks.  Think about it: it starts to pour, all the 9’s are going to be terrified of melting into 7’s (or even 6’s in some rare cases, yikes,) so why not have them snuggle up under your nice big umbrella with you? Exactly. You’re welcome.
BRO TIP: Have your umbrella be as big as possible. The more the merrier, after all.

10) CONDOMS – Yeah, you read that right. I’m going there. Always prepared, remember?
BRO TIP: Nothin. You got this…go get em, slugger.

Happy raging!

The post Top 10 Must-Have Music Festival Essentials For Bros appeared first on JamSpreader.

Is there anyone that Jimmy Fallon DOESN’T jam with?! Let’s see here: in recent years, Fallon has made glorious music with:

Florence Welch:

Crooning out the original instant-hit, “Balls In Your Mouth”

Stephen Colbert & Taylor Hicks:

Singing the Rebecca Black classic, “Friday”

John Densmore of The Doors:

Performing the “Reading Rainbow” theme and showing off his killer Jim Morrison impression.

…to name just a few!  That being said, it only made sense for Fallon to have a jam sesh with the cuddliest governor of them all, New Jersey’s own Chris Christie! Christie stopped by Late Night to slow jam the news, which touched on the recent criticism he’s been receiving about his decision to call an October senate election rather than waiting for November, along with the possibility of a presidential run.

After a brief intro by the governor, Fallon stepped in to croon:

“AwwwwwYEAH. Chris Christie’s about to give New Jersey a…HUGE election.  And he’s putting it in the hands of the people.”

Oh HAAAAAY.

Fallon continued:

“So watch out…cause it’s coming prematurely. October 16th, to be exact.”

Heh heh.

Some other highlights from the performance?

“You need to work hard to be a leader…but not as hard as Anthony Wiener.”

“Listen to my man Chris Christie…the Love Gov.”

“Oh, come on now…Christie Cream Donut….”

Must. Not. Laugh.

You can check out the full five minutes of brilliance below!

http://youtu.be/NCRUHePqyU4

The post See Gov. Chris Christie Slow Jam With Jimmy Fallon appeared first on JamSpreader.

Oh! No You Didn’t!! Amanda Bynes please!!! What happened to the loveable teen star that starred in such shows as “What I Like About You” and who could forget the classic teen movies “She’s The Man” or “Sydney White!”

Amanda Bynes has now decided to go through some sort of transformation so she could step out into the music scene as a rapper? Really?  After being busted for drugs and claiming being harassed by cops. She just happens to mention she’s working on her  new album. Then things get more crazier as Amanda goes after real talent such as Rihanna and makes rude remarks. Yeah that’s a real good publicity stunt. Amanda who’s managing you? That’s who I want to know. I mean Amanda Bynes has now claimed that all this was so not true. She hopes to work with Rihanna in the future, possibly a music video.

Amanda stated:

“I saw a bunch of mocked up tweets about me bashing Rihanna in my mentions. I’m followed by so many people that someone is always mocking up fake tweets, so I feel the need to address them! Rihanna and I met and I’m sure we’ll be in a music video together one day!”

Amanda before you make such a claim put your music out first. Prove to us that you can stand up to the big time rappers. If not keep talking the talk because that’s all you has been doing for the past month.

The post Is Amanda Bynes The Next Nicki Minaj, Pink…? appeared first on JamSpreader.

To some, twerking is an art form. To others, twerking is an attention-grabbing technique.  Unfortunately, to 33 unlucky San Diego Scripps High School students, twerking to them will be forever known as the booty-poppin’ dance that got them suspended. The group was suspended after a video was posted on YouTube, and word got out that it was filmed during the school’s sixth period, AND shot with school video equipment.  The soundtrack to the video being YG’S “You Broke” also ended up being part of the issue, as the school claimed it was against their “zero-tolerance sexual harassment policy.”

http://youtu.be/AxDQ97qgSXs

After hearing the news, fellow students took to social media to spread the word of the suspension, one that still leaves the seniors in jepordy of not being allowed to attend graduation.  DJ Diplo created his own hashtag as well:

I couldn’t have said it better myself, Diplo.  I’ve decided to show my support as well, in the best way possible: with a twerking gif dump.  Enjoy!

The post 33 High School Students Suspended For…Twerking?! appeared first on JamSpreader.

ATTENTION!

There is a mashup of Anchorman (AKA one of the best movies EVER,) and Macklemore’s “Thrift Shop,” and it’s the greatest thing you’ll see all day.  Now, I know what you’re thinking:

But it’s true.  Created by the talented Jake Healy, the mashup features everyone’s favorite one-liners and scenes from the movie, perfectly paired with hottie Macklemore’s smooth voice and melodious beats.  Healy combines incredible talent, timing, and editing to bring you the best thing since cold-ass honkeys, and is promised to bring a smile to any comedy or music lover’s face. After appearing on YouTube, fans have been raving about this mix of pop and comedy, with comments like “Mr. Healy, you are kind of a big deal,” and “Congratulations, you just won the internet!” peppering his page.  I completely agree, but I would like to add…

The post Macklemore & Anchorman Mashup Is “F*cking Awesome” appeared first on JamSpreader.

Smashing Pumpkins frontman Billy Corgan’s new commercial is a real head scratcher.  As a shameless pro wrestling nerd (and obviously a music junkie), I excitedly clicked play when I spotted this video online.  The local TV ad is for both Corgan’s independent wrestling promotion, Resistance Pro, and Walter E. Smithe, a Chicago furniture company.  The combination of wrestling and furniture is usually a good sign when it comes to entertainment value, but this commercial is the sort of thing that just induces cricket chirps and awkward laughter.

Check out the ad below which features Corgan, some of his wrestling talent, a very nice looking chair, and men in suits playing musical chairs.  Yep.

The post Billy Corgan’s New Wrestling & Furniture Commercial – Wait, What? appeared first on JamSpreader.

The Atlantic posted an interesting article yesterday, written by Lindsay Abrams, entitled “Mosh Pits Teach Us About the Physics of Collective Behavior,” which obviously made me do a double take.

The article compares moshers to gas particles, stating that “the statistical description we use for gasses matches the behavior of people in mosh pits.”  There is also a link leading to an interactive mosh pit where you can change things like speed, flock strength, and particle count.  It even goes on to speak about a crowd favorite, the “wall of death.”  SCIENCE.

Maybe if my physics class had more discussions about being in the pit I would have gotten a better grade than a  B-.  I also probably could have remembered to bring my calculator for the tests.  Anyway, check out the article here!

The post The Atlantic Teaches Us Science…with Mosh Pits appeared first on JamSpreader.

The post Late Christmas Present, Anyone? appeared first on JamSpreader.

Aaand the, “we-could-never-be-this-creative-even-if-our-lives-depended-on-it” award goes to…we have a winner.  We came across this tumblr earlier today and felt that the world simply needed to know about the recreation of the worlds best album covers…with some guys old socks.  From The White Stripes classic, “White Blood SOCKS,” to Audioslaves “AudioSOCK,” we just couldn’t let this clever little site slip through the cracks. Enjoy.

The post Check This Out: Famous Album Covers…With Socks. appeared first on JamSpreader.

The post WANT. appeared first on JamSpreader.